Maintain Interpersonal Relationships And Be Unbeaten In The Workplace

In the workplace, you need to maintain emotional support with your boss / boss, colleagues, clients, and those who may be able to help you. In life, you should take good care of your family and friends. This is a complex and troublesome job. It seems that you can't finish it well. How can you make this problem easier?

Rule 1: not to be a good person.

We can easily go into a misunderstanding that we should keep good with everyone.

It should give everyone some energy.

In the end, he became a good person, tired and half dead, and often lamented that his heart was never old.

In fact, what we need to do is to manage our interpersonal relationships, like managing the enterprises. First we know clearly how much we have in our interpersonal relationships, and then classify the objects of interpersonal communication, and then allocate our time and energy rationally to get the most efficient and maximum output value.

For example, you can divide people around you into three categories.

When you are with a group of people, you feel the happiest, the core value can be shared with them, the pain they feel, the way they think, you have to work hard to maintain a good relationship with them, so they put a lot of energy into it.

People like B are those who will help you move forward at work. This kind of communication is more utilitarian, but it doesn't matter. You can decide for yourself what kind of attitude to interact with them.

People like C, you don't like them very much, and they don't help you too much.

When doing this classification, the efficiency and effectiveness of your interpersonal interaction will be greatly improved.

Moreover, this classification will help you adjust your expectations of interpersonal relationships correctly. You will not ask too much for B and C, and you will feel less disappointed.

For some people, we pay emotional exchanges, but it is often difficult to get emotional feedback, and even difficult to resolve contradictions.

In this case, how can we get emotional resonance?

I find it very difficult.

Birds of a feather flock together. There is reason for it. If it's not for the same spirit, no effort will be made. Why bother to spend that spirit? I don't think you need to work so hard.

Of course, if the relationship is a matter of interest, you have to maintain it.

Then reduce your expectation of emotional feedback, as if you have to do something, and you will not be hurt emotionally.

The difficulty of interpersonal relationship is that it involves two independent individuals, not what you do, you can expect certain results.

So, make an evaluation of the return on investment to see what you can get from your feelings, whether it's a return to the soul or material or nothing.

Maybe you should say this is too realistic, but this is a realistic society. Since we are going to discuss it, we must face it rationally.

If you want to reduce the burden of modern people, what burden do you think the most should be unloaded?

Rule three: acceptance of imperfection

It is the burden of perfection.

Too many young people are asking for perfection and asking for impossible things.

As long as you admit that life is not perfect, it is accompanied by compromise, setbacks and limits, and life will be much easier.

Of course, you should go straight ahead, but you can't ask yourself to never make mistakes. You can't ask yourself to succeed once and make yourself soft.

If you really feel attentively and acutely in your life, you can accept the imperfections more easily and keep the pursuit of perfection.

In addition, I have always advocated that we should read more books, look at other people's experience and listen to others' opinions, so that we can correct ourselves.

Emotional rules: Love - security, family - compromise, friendship - let nature take its course.

Many "single men" and "single women" are not celibate. Marriage problems bring them too much pressure. How can they solve problems besides getting married?

Rule four: admit loneliness

When a person feels lonely, the main reason is that he feels unsafe. This is not a matter of going out for a blind date every day. After all, love is a matter of two people.

What can I do? I can only change myself.

Change what? Make yourself feel safe.

So, the first thing we must do is to accumulate something that makes us feel safe, such as house and insurance, not only to help yourself, but also to reduce parents' worries about your future.

The second point is not to be hard headed, but to admit your loneliness.

When you feel lonely, you can tell your friends, "I need you to accompany me today because I feel very uncomfortable."

Friends will not ignore you. When you express your loneliness and unhappiness, you will find that the next interval of loneliness is longer.

The more depressed, the higher the frequency.

If you want to recognize and allow yourself to have this problem, you will gradually find that you can control it.

Now, "condition" is becoming more and more valued in choosing a spouse. This seems to make the "emotional affairs" more loaded. How should we view this problem?

I mentioned this problem in my book, "fill your cup first". I don't think there are certain requirements for choosing a mate when it's wrong.

For a simple example, you have 1.7 meter men, and only 1.6 meter of your husband. If you can be proud to introduce this to your husband, that's fine. But if you are old and plain, he is shorter than you, you can't wear high heels, you will unconsciously want to hide him, then don't marry.

For example, if you marry a man whose income is ten thousand a month, or a man earning fifty thousand a month, the difference in life is not essential, but there is essential difference between the monthly income of one thousand and the monthly income of ten thousand.

So, you need to be honest with your outlook on life and values, what really care about, what are the consequences of not caring about it. If you can't bear it, don't force it, otherwise love will really be burdened.

The balance between family and work is a difficult problem for married people, especially women, and how can they keep their emotions fresh with their partners and children?

Rule six: fish and bear's paws must not be mixed.

This perfect realm can only be found in dreams. There is no good fish and bear's paws in life. First of all, this expectation is not right.

There will be trade-offs and compromise.

It depends on whose job is more forward-looking and whose income contributes more to the family. Two people should calm down and consider.

If two people's work is very important, then make a classification.

You don't have to cook or wash clothes every day. Hourly workers can help you. But chatting with your husband and telling stories to your children can't be replaced by others. You have to do it yourself.

In a word, it is necessary to spend your spirit on the most productive things.

For example, my husband and I have a habit of persisting in working hard at weekends, unless there are special circumstances.

The feeling with your family is a very subtle thing. The other side will have many expectations and demands for you, and it will often become the cause of the quarrel. How can this burden be reduced?

There are usually two reasons for this. The first reason is that you can't express clearly that you can't meet all their expectations. The second reason is that when you spend time with them, you don't fully satisfy their accompanying needs.

For example, when he is talking with a child, you are constantly answering the phone or watching TV.

In fact, if you improve the quality of your company, they will not always complain that you are not at home.

After entering the society, we can never find the kind of pure friendship in the campus. The friendship between friends has been utilitarian. Is it to be alone or to drift with the tide?

Rule eight: accept the acceptance.

From a certain point of view, this situation is possible.

When it comes to friendship, there is a stage when friendship is more utilitarian when everyone is climbing up.

But once you climb up to a height that you feel like it is about the same, slow down and breathe, you will find that a pure friendship will come up again.

It's like these very close friends I met before I was more than 40 years old.

Everyone at different ages will encounter this stage of ups and downs, this is life, let nature take its course, should be happy to face, otherwise life is boring.